I hate this happened, I hope all things work out for you. But you definitely don't want a ban yet. If he gets banned right now, there is no other communication through Ca.com. He will be banned for sure, but try to keep at least a couple lines of communication open, that way there is no doubt he could have got in touch with you.
its easy to look at receiving it as a gift as you never have to give it back. put yourself in his shoes and you would be pissed and not dismiss like it sounds like you are. sending funds via a gift for purchasing good/services is just stupid. if your the seller and do not want to pay the fee then charge the extra few bucks you cheapskate. you have been lucky but i guarantee once it happens to you, things will change and you will never send money as a gift for good/services again as you have no backing in your purchase. basically you just gave someone money. only way would be to a person you actually know.
All banks no matter what can have the money returned..
THere is always a risk, I agree with that but not everyone is a scammer. Some people actually value their reputation. In some cases I actually receive item before I pay. That if seller reputation is questionable and he wants to reestablish it. calling me a cheapskate is uncalled for. You don`t know me. If you want to make paypal rich it`s your call.
