WTB: Best joke..?

[its_bacon12 10+ year member]

ok ok i know its for sale forum and for car audio but here it goes

i hav 6.78 chillin in paypal thats just bugging me so i figured id do this : best joke in this thread gets $6.78 paypal

fire away //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/biggrin.gif.d71a5d36fcbab170f2364c9f2e3946cb.gif

WARNING: may contain offensive material so leave all political, religous and personal beleifs out of this thread please //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/smile.gif.1ebc41e1811405b213edfc4622c41e27.gif

edit: 6.5 hours left as of 2:30 pm 02/17/05

Click to read more...

 

[ballstothewall 10+ year member]

Why does an Elephaunt wear red shoes?

To hide in the Cherry Trees!!!!!

Have you ever seen an elephaunt in a cherry tree??

It Works dosen't It!!!!!!

What do you call the brown stuff between elephaunts toes?

Slow Natives.

 

[its_bacon12 10+ year member]

...

ur sick...

 

[DBfan187 5,000+ posts]

Shortly after her wedding, the newlywed wife is complaining to her mother about her husband's insatiable sexual appetite.

"He wants to do it 15 times a day, anytime, anyplace, anywhere -- on the table, on the stairs, on the sofa, in the car, in the morning, in the afternoon, and in the evening. I can barely walk anymore!"

The mother advises her daughter to tell him that she has her period, which seems like a good idea.

So that evening, when the husband comes home from work, he proceeds to undress himself and his wife, when she stops him.

"I'm sorry sweetie, but it's that time of the month."

The husband gets up, looks at his wife, and says, "It's all good honey. I understand." He puts on a robe and walks away.

The wife is somewhat surprised at the mature reaction of her husband, until a few minutes later he returns holding two glasses and a bottle of champagne.

So she asks, "What's going on, dear?"

"We're celebrating!" he replies.

"Celebrating? What exactly are we celebrating?" she asks.

"Anal sex week!"

 

[chinny 5,000+ posts]

Shortly after her wedding, the newlywed wife is complaining to her mother about her husband's insatiable sexual appetite.
"He wants to do it 15 times a day, anytime, anyplace, anywhere -- on the table, on the stairs, on the sofa, in the car, in the morning, in the afternoon, and in the evening. I can barely walk anymore!"

The mother advises her daughter to tell him that she has her period, which seems like a good idea.

So that evening, when the husband comes home from work, he proceeds to undress himself and his wife, when she stops him.

"I'm sorry sweetie, but it's that time of the month."

The husband gets up, looks at his wife, and says, "It's all good honey. I understand." He puts on a robe and walks away.

The wife is somewhat surprised at the mature reaction of her husband, until a few minutes later he returns holding two glasses and a bottle of champagne.

So she asks, "What's going on, dear?"

"We're celebrating!" he replies.

"Celebrating? What exactly are we celebrating?" she asks.

"Anal sex week!"

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[PhatTonyDeMarco 5,000+ posts]

A guy walks into a bathroom, it appears he has no arms. There is another man in the bathroom and the armless man walks up to a urinal and says, "Hey buddy, can ya help me out?" And he gestures towards his penis with his head.

The man replies "Uh, I dont know.." He finaly decides it is fine to do because he it helping his fellow man, and he unzips the mans zipper.

The man then says "Can ya take it out for me?"

The other man looks disgusted, but does it anyway. And when he does, he sees the mans penis; it is green and giving off brown discharge.

So the armless man pees and the other guy zips his pants up for him.

Then the man says, "If you dont mind me asking, whats wrong with your penis?"

So the armless man replies, "Fvck if I know," and then he pulls his arms through his sleeves, "But I'm not touchin it."

BTW, are you gonna buy a joke, or is this just a funny thread now?

 

[DBfan187 5,000+ posts]

BTW, are you gonna buy a joke, or is this just a funny thread now?

Dude, I won that **** a while back.

I gotz paid y0!

 

[BassAddictJ 5,000+ posts]

Your mother's so stupid she though manual labor was the president of mexico.

 

[rob_z89 10+ year member]

what does michael jackson and mcdonalds have incommin?

they both put meat between 5 year olds buns!!!! //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif

ok im not racist i just herd this joke ok

 

[Slody4Futbol 10+ year member]

What does Michael Jackson & Caviar have in common?

They both come on little crackers :-D

 

[blackMTXgold 10+ year member]

what does michael jackson and mcdonalds have incommin?

they both put meat between 5 year olds buns!!!! //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/laugh.gif.48439b2acf2cfca21620f01e7f77d1e4.gif

i work at mcdonalds, and i still find it hilarious //content.invisioncic.com/y282845/emoticons/biggrin.gif.d71a5d36fcbab170f2364c9f2e3946cb.gif

 

[h_saleh 10+ year member]

heres a funny joke

A man named chris called his boss eric, to tell eric that he was sick and couldn't come to work. Eric told chris that when he was sick he slept with his wife and he wasn't sick any more. chris said he'll try it... chris comes to work smiling and feeling really good...Eric looks at chris and asked him if it worked. Chris said it worked and your wife says hi!

 

[Biker 10+ year member]

This 16 year old girl wants to go to the movies with here boyfriend friday night so she asks her dad if she can use the car Friday night. Dad says sure but you have to give me a Blow job. NO, No she says , I cant do that to my dad. Then on Thurday she is getting desperate and asks again, Dad has the same reply and again she cant bring herself to doing that. Then on Friday shes afraid of losing her boyfriend so she asks again and gets the same reply, Oh well Dad your sick but I really need the car so OK. After the act was done her dad says to her, well that wasnt so bad was it, and she thought about it for a sec and said, Not to bad but it kinda tasted a little like ****, Which Dad quickly replied, Oh sorry I almost forgot, I promised your brother the car tonight ............

 

[SATX210]

there are two gay guys in an apartment building and they are banging each other, when all of a sudden the fire alarm goes off. there is only one way out and thats thru a window. which one leaves first?

the one in the front. he alrady has his shiat packed

 

[ThomasG 5,000+ posts]

Your mom is so fat it effects her self esteem

 

[DBfan187 5,000+ posts]

I won. lol